106. New Year, Same You: How to Embrace Intentional Madrehood

In this episode, I share my reflections on the start of 2025, emphasizing the importance of intentional motherhood over traditional New Year's resolutions. I discuss the value of setting intentions that nurture who we already are rather than trying to transform ourselves.

You'll hear about three practical tips for intentional motherhood. Additionally, I introduce my new membership community, the Viva la Mami Collective, and its exciting activities, including Mami Meetups and a mentorship program for Latina moms in the Chicago area.

Join me in redefining madrehood and fostering genuine connections within our comunidad!

Feeling overwhelmed by navigating cultural expectations and modern parenting as a Latina mom? Join Balanced Madrehood, Viva la Mami's signature coaching program designed to empower Latina moms to create a more balanced and fulfilling madrehood journey.  Head over to vivalamami.com/balanced-madrehood to learn more!

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Transcript

1:18

Hola, hola, amiga. I hope you have started out the year right, and looking forward to a new year ahead of us. I know that for me, I took a well deserved two week break, even though I didn't feel like it because let's face it. Mommying is. A 24 seven job, but it felt nice to just relax and enjoy quality time. Con la familia, my parents came over from Mexico to celebrate with us. And so it was a really great time spent with our family. But now it's getting back to a new year. I'm really looking forward to an exciting time, at least for me personally, but also Drew. This podcast and Viva La Mami in general, there are so many exciting things going on right now with Viva La Mami, where I just want to share out to the world of the communidad that I'm building for the first time I am creating And in real life type of experience, at least for the local mamas who are near me in the Chicago area, where Latina moms, can come together and bond and create amistad and just to share their unique experiences as mamas. There's so much value in creating community in person. We are. Done with the pandemic way of living, we have no excuses to be in isolation, and therefore we definitely need to get together and compartir and share our stories, have that one on one or group type of experience because there's nothing like being in person with other people. We are social beings. That's how we essentially live. And so, with that being said, I have created my newest membership, Comunidad, which is called the Viva La Mami Collective, and I'll tell you a little bit more at the end of the show, but in this episode, we're talking about something that's been kind of heavy in my mind lately as we enter 2025, and that is the pressure to completely transform ourselves with new year's resolutions. For me personally, I don't have resolutions. And. I've mentioned this in the past. I don't believe in them. Resolutions are just ways that want us to make us like completely change into different people. But my means, what if I told you that you're already exactly who you need to be? What if instead of trying to become a different person, we focus on intentionally nurturing who we already are. And so for today, I am going to share just a couple of tips about how we can. Feel like we are already fulfilled and just to be intentional of our intentions. And that way we don't get all nuts about not trying to meet certain goals. I think as we face certain challenges, certain milestones and transitions in our day to day, Lives, we often lose track of what we wanted to do for the year, right? Like I am totally guilty about doing something completely different just because it's the start of the new year, but instead let's just be intentional. And again, without losing the essence of who we are. So stay tuned. As I share a little bit more about how we can embrace intentional motherhood in this new year. And I'm also going to share a little bit more of my membership community, the Viva La Mami Collective. So stay tuned. Okay, Mami. So let's be real. How many of us have written long lists of resolutions only to feel guilty by March? And research shows that oftentimes people are very consistent with their New Year's resolutions, really up until March, that's when they kind of go back into their non New Year's resolutions. And the reason why is because sometimes people set unrealistic goals and unrealistic resolutions, really, when you think about resolutions, it's more so about, yes, you are trying to resolve an issue that you want to accomplish, but when you think about a resolution, it's essentially a decision that you do not want to do. And so it's almost like counterintuitive, like. You have resolutions that you want to do, but the definition itself, it's something that you don't want to do. So it's already confusing when you really think about it. And I'm not trying here to be super logical about it, but I just don't like the word in itself. And I also don't think it's realistic, at least for us who are currently in the season of life of managing. all of these different aspects around motherhood. And so between managing our casa, career, kids, and everything in between, these rigid goals often set us up for disappointment, and often shame for ourselves. And so I remember last year when I thought I had to wake up at 5 a. m. and To be a better mom by setting things ready by doing some self care for myself. But guess what? It wasn't sustainable and it wasn't realistic for me. Personally, I am more productive at night rather than in the mornings. So I just like struggled trying to wake up in the morning and it didn't make me better. It just made me more tired and more throughout the day, and that wasn't fair for my kids, and for my family. So instead of resolutions, let's talk about intentions. What's the difference? While resolutions demand that we change who we are, Intentions guide how we want to experience our motherhood journey. Whatever intentions that you may have in mind are kind of like your Northern star. Or your compass to make sure that you do not lose track of what you want to do. In the context of our day to day lives as moms. It's important to set intentions of how it can guide us with meeting certain goals or expectations. This doesn't mean like waking up in the morning at like the crack of dawn. It essentially means what are some actions that I can take in order for me to feel in peace with myself. And so I'm going to share three simple tips for intentional motherhood. And the first one is to reimagine the sacrificial mom narrative. We've been inherited this belief that being a good mom means putting ourselves last. And I always say this, but it's really hard to break away from this sort of mindset, this sacrificial mom that we've seen it through our own mothers, our abuelitas Diaz, pretty much most of the women in our family. We have often seen them put themselves last and not really prioritize in themselves, but here's the truth. Taking care of yourself isn't selfish. It's pretty revolutionary. When you think about it, when you set time to focus on yourself and this could be, you know, taking an extra half an hour to sleep, or when you say no, or when you choose yourself over. Anyone else, you're breaking generational patterns of that maternal sacrifice. Your well being matters just as much as everyone else's in your family. And so this is a way in which you can be intentional of being unapologetically like heffa mode. When you think about it in your job, if you are a working mom, you know, your own boundaries, right? You're not going to do everything that you are being told or everything that you think that you should do, right? You set those boundaries. And when it comes to the household. You can definitely set those boundaries. You don't have to sacrifice yourself over all the things that you think that you need to do, because guess what? There are definitely ways that you can delegate. There are things that can wait. Okay. There are events or experiences where, you know, you might want to prioritize yourself over even your kids, your kids can wait as well. They don't have to be. Entertain all the dang time, right? Like they can read a book while you read a book, you can take a longer shower and your kids are going to be fine, right? So just try to be intentional of the time that you spend for yourself. And that way you don't have to sacrifice yourself because at the end of the day, you want to be a happy mommy too, right? Okay, so the second tip I also have is to create sacred space for your mental health. And I really am an advocate of therapy. I'm all about how in our Latinx culture, we need to normalize therapy and mental health in our cultura. Maybe you've heard sucia se lava en casa. But healing isn't something to hide. And so for me, I ended 2024 with going back to therapy and I really want to be intentional. Of continuing on with therapy this year and for me, it's, it's worked that way, but I know for some of you, you may prefer meditation or joining a support group or going on for yoga, whatever it is, but it is so important to prioritize your mental health because it's not just like okay to prioritize your mental health. It is definitely necessary, especially as we're going through the trenches of motherhood. We already feel isolated in this journey. So might as well share this with a therapist. If you have. Increased anxiety because you are more nervous to get out the house with your kids and maybe you are freaked out about driving and taking them to school or what have you. I definitely felt that way at times, and I have a very close friend where driving wasn't a thing for her anymore, but then through therapy, that really helped her or if it's how you can you practice breathing and maybe you just need a coach that can help you on establishing breathing techniques that can help you. Alleviate your nervous system. So there are different ways on how you can create that sacred space that you need, especially as it comes with this. Your mental health so you can start small you can set maybe 15 minutes of your day For your mental well being. This could be meditation. This could be yoga again that breathing exercises There are apps there are people available for you There are professionals out there that can really resonate with our experiences and so Your mental health definitely deserves the same care you give to your family. So think about that. And then finally, the third tip is to embrace the power of no me importa. All right. So as Latina moms, we often carry the weight of everyone's expectations from our family to kind of like the social and gendered expectations that. We've been born with really. And so today I want you to practice the art of Ne vale, no me importa, I don't care. When your tia makes a comment about your parenting choices, when you're putting my questions, why you're not at every family gathering, when society tells you how a Latina mom should be like, ignore that, you do you boo, that's all that matters. And so your piece isn't up for negotiation. I know that that is something that I'm definitely going to do for this year. I don't give an F about my decisions, about my family's decisions, because at the end of the day, no one else is with us. It's just me, my hubby, and my two kids. Does that make sense? Hope it does. And so remember, mummies, this isn't about an overnight transformation. I mean, really, beingit's about small, intentional choices that Honors you as a woman that honors you as a mom and your growth. Take what resonates, leave what doesn't and trust your instincts. That is essentially the essence of. Why I'm telling you being intentional this year and writing intentions for yourself is so important Rather than just setting resolutions for the new year. Alright, so mommies I have something very special to invite you to this month's mommy meetup in our Viva La Mami collective is going to be transformative If you are a local Chicago area mommy, we're coming together to write our letters of intention for the new year. But wait before you think, oh no, not another resolution list. This is different. We're not focusing on what needs to change about ourselves. Instead, we're writing intentions that honor our current season of life. Whether if you're in the newborn trenches, navigating toddler tensions, or balancing work and family, your intentions should reflect your reality. What makes this mommy meetup even more special? Is that we're launching our mommy mentorship program as well. I am so excited to have paired three mentors and mommy mentees, and for the first time, they're going to meet together in person. And this is an opportunity for all mommies to create connections that go beyond like surface level friendships or. I know this mom because my kid knows this kid because they go to the school together. No, these are going to be actual mom friends. amigas, essentially. And so these are relationships with other mommies who get it, who understand our journey and who want to grow alongside you. So if you are interested in also being a part of the Mommy Mentorship Program within the Viva La Mami Collective, in the show notes, I'll be sharing different ways to, to Join the collective through different membership tiers. And if you have any questions, feel free to send me a DM on Instagram, which is Viva La Mami, or you can email me at contact at Viva La Mami dot com. Do you also have an idea for a future episode or know someone who should be on the show? I have links in the show notes on how you can suggest topics or guests on the show. I believe that our voices and stories truly matter, and I want to hear them. I also want you to hear them as well. and don't forget to follow us on, Instagram, which is at Viva La Mami for daily inspiration and communidad. And of course, if you want to be in the know about exciting events, information about our merch and tips and anything in between. Please sign up for our newsletter. I will also link that in the show notes. All right, mamas, well, this was a quick episode. I know I'm busy. You're busy, too. Don't want to keep you here for long. But I want to thank you for spending this time with me. I am back, baby, in 2025. I'm really excited for this year. I am excited to have guests over on the show and for me to also share with you a couple of solo episodes and that way, we are all redefining motherhood. All right. Well, hasta la próxima y nos vemos on the next episode./