162. Navigating College Admissions as a First-Gen Parent

In this solo episode, I'm pulling back the curtain on a side of me I don't often share - my professional story. I walk you through my journey as a first-generation college student, how I stumbled into the world of higher education, and the decade-long career in college admissions and counseling that followed. And yes, I have a BIG announcement at the end that I'm so excited to finally share with you.

What you'll hear:

• My experience navigating the college process as a first-gen Latina with no roadmap and limited guidance
• How I transferred colleges, found my people, and discovered a whole career path I didn't know existed
• Why first-gen parents are just as underserved as their children when it comes to college admissions
• The gap I noticed while reviewing college applications, and why what worked 10 years ago won't work for our kids today

Resources Mentioned:

• Schedule your free 20-minute consultation with me!

Transcript

Jessica 0:00

I come to realize that as first-generation parents, we are just as underserved as first-gen students. And the reason why I'm saying this is because perhaps our generation, we probably just made it through to get to college, and we probably had the resources, we probably have not. But for those of us that didn't, just like me we probably don't understand what it's like to apply to college, especially in today's super highly competitive landscape. Hola, hola. Welcome to the Viva La Mami podcast. I'm your host, Jessica Cuevas. And on today's solo episode, I'm going to share a little bit more about me on a personal, professional side. I feel like I've created Viva La Mami as a brand of its own, and kind of shared with you just, like, a small part of my story and who I am as a Latina mom navigating madre-hood in, in a world where we feel ni de aquí ni de allá even though we are de aquí y de allá, especially being born and raised in the United States. And kinda having this sort of, multi-layered identity crisis as not just a Latina, but now a mamá, and all of the other identities that we hold. And so I've only shared kind of, like, that part of who I am, but I've never really shared with you who I am on a professional side. I've kind of given you little snippets of, like, me working in higher education, but I never really have walked you through my whole story. And so on today's episode, I'm going to share with you who I am, especially as a first-generation college graduate, and now a college professional, and how that sort of influenced me and my decision to remain in this college access space. Just because that is something that I hold true and dear to my heart. That is something that I s- am still continuing on when it comes to providing assistance to potential college students, especially those that identify as first generation. And so I hope that you can stick around in this solo episode. And in fact, in the coming weeks I'm going to share with you more about, Going through the college process, especially as first-generation kids. Now, if you are a mama who is listening and has a rising junior or senior in high school, I hope that you can stick around because I think that this information is going to be relevant to you just because you may be going through the process yourself, helping your child get to college. Pero también, if you know anyone that has a rising junior or senior, please share this episode as well. Uh, but this doesn't mean that it's only exclusively for parents that have, you know, a rising junior or senior. I think this can be super relatable, especially us as Latina mamas, that the majority of my audience are based in the US, are millennials. Most likely, you are either first or second generation born in the United States, and you probably have had experienced what it's like to be a first-gen college student. And so I hope that you can stick around because I have a lot to share, including a special announcement all right, So I'm gonna walk you through, like, a decade years back. Now, this is going to be a short episode, I promise, but I think so that you know who I am and what I essentially prepared my whole college education for. I want to give you kinda like that foundation so that way you know where I come from. I am Not just, like, the first daughter in my family, right? I, I'm not just, like, the firstborn, but I'm also the first to go to college in my family. And in fact, I, I feel like I have always been put on a pedestal. I'm sure that many of you who are first gen can totally relate just because we have to adhere to this, like, sort of standard that is almost, like, ingrained in you growing up. You know, que eres la primera to do this. Que, you know, that you have to be a good example for everyone else behind you. And for me, it wasn't just my two sisters, my siblings, but it was also, like, my cousins, and I'm the first cousin. So you could already imagine, like, that kind of pressure that is almost set on you, and, and that sort of expectation that you grew up with in being, you know, the perfect Mexican daughter, literally. And I'm referencing this, um, Erika Sanchez's book. If you haven't read it, please do so. And so yeah, so I, I felt that pressure in being this perfect image, not just for my parents, but for my grandparents, my tias, my tios, you know, and my cousins as well, and as well as my siblings. So being that, I knew that I had no other choice but to go to college. But it was m- a very interesting experience navigating how to get to college, right? And, uh, a lot of us, if we have really good mentors, if we have really good teachers and school counselors, um, we could make it to get into a reputable school or a school that probably you never thought of. But for me, I didn't have that. I went to a Chicago public neighborhood school. If you don't know what that is, it's basically the high school that you end up going to if you don't apply for selective enrollment. My parents had no idea what selective enrollment was, so I never applied to the special programs, quote, unquote, and the highly selective schools within the Chicago public school system to get to high school. So I just ended up going to a high school that I thought would benefit me in terms of, like, playing in the orchestra and, you know, doing something different. But in fact, academically speaking, it wasn't a, a good high school if you wanna- You know, consider it that way. And so yeah, so I didn't have the one-on-one attention. I did have a really great school counselor who really impacted me in my decision to go to college. But because he worked with the rest of the seniors, and my senior class was like 1,000, he didn't provide me that one-on-one, right? Like, he was available when he was available, and so I kinda had to do it on my own. All what I knew about colleges were like the colleges nearby in Chicago. And I remember, you know, watching movies, and I'd be like,"Oh, wow, like those people stay on a campus, and, and that's cool. Like, they sleep in a room. It's almost like a hotel." And, and so I never got to really have a full, um, understanding of like what college can do to you, right? It's almost me understanding that college is for you to get an education and you to have kinda like this different experience than your family, but not what college can bring to you and your kind of like trajectory of your life. And so the reason why I'm saying that is because that really impacted me in terms of like not understanding that there's a lot of options, and I pretty much limited myself because I just thought that I wasn't gonna get admitted. I honestly applied to the schools where there wasn't an essay requirement, where the ACT was like- You know, I don't know, minimum like a 17 or an 18 because I think that's what I got. I think I got like a 19 or something on the ACT, so clearly pretty low. I was never a good test taker to start with, but I never knew that you can get a tutor or to get basically trained and develop these certain skills to take these standardized tests. And so yeah, I just wanted like a simple, like easy college process where I didn't have to worry about it because ultimately the end goal was to get an education. But I didn't know like how much within your college experience was going to really, um, develop and influence your life college is so pivotal in, in your development, in your social life, in your leadership, in not just academics, but it, it's, it, it kind of transforms you and, and I didn't know that. So I just decided to go to a small private liberal arts school that was like 10 minutes away from my house. it was a commute. I decided to be a commuter, and it wasn't until orientation where of course during orientation you stay at the campus and you get to experience just a little snippet of what student life would be like. And I was like,"Oh my gosh, I wanna live on a campus. This looks so cool." And, I had asked the office of residence life if there's any way that I can live on campus, and they're like,"Yeah, but the type of financial aid will change, and if you were to stay on campus, this is how much you would have to pay." And basically if I would commute, I, I think I didn't even have... I, I think I didn't even pay anything out of pocket, uh, because everything was covered. Um, and so I didn't wanna put that deficit on my parents, I do remember telling my mom like,"Oh, I wanna live on campus and everything." But she was like,"It doesn't make sense for you to live on campus when you're 10 minutes away." And, and that also made sense, right? Like, you're literally 10 minutes away from the school So I was like,"Okay, fine." And so I went through the first year, and honestly, part of me felt like I wanted to have the full college experience. It didn't matter what type of school. For me, it was more so about being fully immersed in the community and taking advantage of all the opportunities that were being offered as a student. So I decided to transfer after my first year, and I decided to go to a similar school because I knew that I wanted a small college. And at that time, I kinda had an idea of what college would be like, and I knew that I wanted to go to a small private school just because coming from a large public high school, I knew that going into a large public university I'm only considered a number and not a, a student and a, a literal human being. The commuter school that I decided to go to didn't have an orchestra. And throughout my whole four years of high school, I was in an orchestra where I played the violin, and I really missed being a part of that kind of group. And so I knew that transferring into a small private school, I wanted to go to a school where they had an orchestra. It didn't matter if it was like a conservatory or, you know, something chill, like I just knew that I wanted to continue on with playing. And so I finally found the school which was four hours away from Chicago. It was still in Illinois, but it was far away for me to first live on campus and for me not to keep coming back home. And I knew that it was a good balance between not being too far away, where I didn't have to like fly. I could literally drive or get carpooled or whatever. Or, uh, there was a train route that picked me up from the nearest city to, you know, Chicago. So I was like,"Okay, I'm gonna give it a try." And I visited. It was literally in the middle of nowhere. You know, this- I, I just, now that I look back, I was like,"Why did I choose this school?" Because, you know, I'm a city girl, and I love the city, and I decided to go to a school that was completely removed from an urban environment. It was super rural. Like, there wasn't even a Walmart, y'all. Like, There were definitely more bars than, like, restaurants. So it was literally middle of nowhere in rural Western Illinois. So it was different, but I was up for the challenge. And I was like,"Yeah, I think I wanna go here." And honestly, I had a good experience in terms of my development my social skills and, you know, kinda understanding how to manage your time. And so I really felt like I got the skill sets that I needed to succeed in the future, right? So not only was I in the, school's orchestra, but I was in a sorority. I was in, uh, different leadership groups. I was an admissions tour guide. And through that experience, I was kind of intrigued with working in an admissions office. And so my major was Spanish Education, so I wanted to be a bilingual teacher, like literally in the classroom, but after three practicums, I was like,"This isn't for me." I remember taking a math class, and it was so intensive because even though I always wanted to teach high school, I had to get a K12 certification in order for me to be a bilingual teacher. And so that elementary math class was basically the one that I was like,"No, this isn't for me." And after taking a couple practicums too, I was like,"Ooh, I don't know if I wanna be a teacher." I kinda wanna do something behind the scenes, something where I still get to work within the education, environment, but not necessarily be the one teaching. And so when I talked about that with... I would consider her a mentor. She was the one who helped me transfer into the school. I was like,"Um, yeah, I don't know what I should do." She was like,"You should try admissions. I think you would be good at it because you're already a tour guide. Like, I've seen you." And I was like,"Well, is that a job?" And she was like,"Yeah." And she was like- There's this other world of higher education that you can work for, and, and I literally thought that education was literally just, like, K through 12. And I was like,"Oh, yeah. Duh." Like, higher ed does exist. So my senior year, I decided to take an internship at the admissions office and kinda get a little glimpse of what that would be like, um, so that way I can be prepared and go to the workforce to go into admissions. So if you ever meet an admissions person, and you ask them, like,"What brought you to work in college admissions?" They're most likely going to say, I never knew that I can work in admissions." Or they would say like,"Oh, admissions brought me, and I kinda did this, and, you know, I thought that admissions would be something that I can do for three years and then move on." And while that is true for the most part, for me, I knew that I wanted to be an admissions counselor. I was that Andy Bernard from The Office that really wanted to represent, you know, not just their alma mater, but, you know, just work in an admissions office and be sort of like that ambassador of, like, you know, the university. Once I was ready to graduate, I was looking for, uh, me to work back home in, in the Chicago area. And I landed a job at a similar college, a small, private, four-year liberal arts college located in the suburbs of Chicago, and that was the best job that I ever had. It set a great foundation for me to be immersed into this professional world that I never thought it existed. While my mom did work in an office in downtown Chicago as a claims processor for a very reputable health insurance company, she was very back end, right? Like, very administrative, back end, like, just processing data, and that's it. And for me, like, going into this role, not only was I doing administrative tasks, but I was also, like, the front and center person to work directly with students, especially prospective students. I traveled. I visited a ton of high schools across the state of Illinois, and that really helped me h-have, like, a great foundation to have a better understanding of, college admissions. And, and three years after that, my husband and I decided to buy a condo in the city because back then we lived in the suburbs. And so we decided to, um, I decided to look for other job opportunities. And then I- Went on to work for Loyola University Chicago, which is my alma mater, and that's where I got my master's from. I started to be involved through a professional organization called the Illinois Association for College Admission Counseling, which is like an affiliate of NACAC, which is the National Association for College Admission Counseling, I started to kind of create my own brand, and I started to, you know, be involved, and people kind of started to recognize me. And through that, I then got-- went into another role as a regional admissions counselor. So I would represent a university that is based outside of the Chicago area. This was in Decatur, Illinois. Um, it's Millikin University, a very great fine arts institution. And I decided to work for them, but I would be regionally based in Chicago back home. This was my literally first remote type of experience. And then a couple years later, I worked for the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, similar thing where I was a regional representative. And so I was already like, what? I don't know, years into my role that I was like,"Okay, I want something different." Like, I'm doing the same thing, talking to students, you know, traveling. And at that time, we wanted to start having a family, and I was like,"Well, I don't know if traveling would be good for me and my mental health and trying to take care of myself and trying to have a family." And so I decided to go into, college counseling, and that is kind of like when, when people say like,"Oh, they went to the other side of the desk." Like, literally, you go to the other side of the desk where you're not being the admissions rep working for the university. You are now being the counselor and working in K12, right? And helping them, um, choose, like, what institutions they wanna go, uh, apply to or attend or what have you. And so, I decided to do that just because I felt that I had enough under my belt to have a, an understanding of higher education and college admissions and understanding just different types of institutions. So I then worked at a high school in Chicago, had a fantastic experience. Um, it was a private school. 100% of the students are, um, Latinos, mostly Mexican, and first generation. So this was a type of student population that I really wanted to focus on and nurture and have a, you know, great experience with them. But at that time, m- m- we, my husband and I, moved back to the suburbs, and it was, like, a one-hour commute for me to get to the high school in Chicago, okay? And at that time, I had my firstborn, Diego, and he was a baby, and I went through this horrible, uh, depression of, I literally have intrusive thoughts that I am, I wasn't going to make it home, um, after commuting from school. And it really affected my mental health. And with balancing this identity as a mom and trying to have this profession, especially the one that you love, it, and now finding this new love as a mom, like, it's so hard to balance that. And I decided to leave that job. And, and I don't know. Like, I, I thought that it wasn't for me because I felt like I couldn't be my 100% in front of these students, and I also couldn't be my 100% in front of my kid, you know? Like, I wasn't there with him. And, and so it just, yeah, I decided to leave after the first year of working for that high school. I decided not to work. But I kinda wanted to still be connected to, like, the college counseling, higher education landscape. And so I decided to work part-time at a not-for-profit that is mostly focused on helping students get to college. It's exclusively for first generation, low income students from the city of Chicago So I worked with students across the city from different high schools, different levels of their ad- academic kind of like pursuits. And so it really gave me a full range of like the possibilities of these students getting into different types of colleges and universities. And I was working there for three years as a part-time college counselor. But right before we decided to move to Mexico, They notified us that the part-time positions were going to be terminated, they were only looking for full-time counselors, and they offered me a, the full-time position. But because at that time we had already made plans to move here to Mexico, I was like,"Actually, I can't, so unfortunately, I, I had to let that go. Once we moved to Mexico, I applied for a part-time application reviewer position with the University of Illinois, and that really gave me an understanding of like what's the current, trend of higher ed, especially within this university, which is one of the most competitive universities if you wanna go into engineering. so last fall, I was reviewing applications kind of part-time, and now I started with a college consulting firm that, um, helps students get into college. And so it's been a mix of everything really, but basically with the intention of continuing on with this work. I know that I gave you like a whole spiel about my career, but I kinda wanted to share you that just so that you know where I've come from and where I wanna go from here, you know. I feel like my experience as a first-generation college student has really impacted the way that I wanna support students nowadays, the way that I wanna, you know, kinda inform families about what the current stakes are in higher education. I am someone that has always thrived and, and tried to like- be most informed about what are the current trends and everything so that I can better inform the students and families about what I learned and what I know and, you know, and how it can essentially influence their decisions in either attending college or choosing one college versus the other, especially when it comes to financial aid and all of that. It wasn't until last fall when I was reviewing college applications, that I really saw a big gap between students that are considered not first-generation anymore because their parents might have been first-generation, and the students that come years and years of, like, generations of not being first-gen in college, right? And I saw the difference between the students that, have the resources or the means, or they have the support and the capital to navigate this system, but then I look at another population of students where perhaps their parents were the first ones to go to college. I've seen applications where the level of edu- education that their parents have earned is either a bachelor's or one is a bachelor's and associate's. And then they end up applying to schools where it's either not a good fit for them, or when I review their applications and I read their essays, Those essays are not so well-written when it comes to the standards of, like, getting into that school, okay? And, and I've seen this huge gap between the students that do have the resources to apply to college versus the students that do not. I come to realize that as first-generation parents, we are just as underserved as first-gen students. And the reason why I'm saying this is because perhaps our generation, we probably just made it through to get to college, and we probably had the resources, we probably have not. But for those of us that didn't, just like me we probably don't understand what it's like to apply to college, especially in today's super highly competitive landscape. I would say that especially for family members or people that you know that have gone to college, they probably don't understand what the current trends of higher education are. They probably don't understand what is it that colleges are actually looking for at this given time. Because if it worked out for them, that doesn't mean that it's gonna work out for your kid. And so that's what I've noticed, that many of us, especially first-gen and Latine, like, people, we often rely on our own community, which is great. I love it. But you also, if you really wanna get your kid into a school that either they've always been wanting to, that you've always been wanting to, or that you know that there's probably different options. I mean, after all, there's over 4,000 colleges and universities in the United States alone. There are professionals that can help you. And I'm not discrediting the people who got into Stanford, ella es la sobrina that got in there five years ago, and she's gonna help your kid get into Stanford. Like, great, that can be a supplemental kind of, like, assistance. But when it comes to actually supporting and helping your child in a strategic way, there are individuals that can help you to get there, and these are called college counseling consultants, or independent Educational consultants, IECs. and so Now that I'm, I'm here in Mexico, I'm trying to figure out what are ways that I can build my skill set and hone into them. And based on the toolkit that I have, right, I have all of these different tools under my belt, like, what are ways that I can better support families and students to get to college, and especially this particular population? This, this has been something in my head that has been going on for the past, like, six months, literally. Like, three months after moving into Mexico when I had a little bit of clarity after moving in and transitioning over to a new country. I was like, How can I better expand this vision to help potential college students, and especially parents that are considered first generation and they probably don't know how to best support their student so I'm gonna do my own college consulting business. Why not?" And so I know that, um, this is pretty off track from, like, Viva La Mommy and motherhood, but as a mom myself, I know that I want the best for my kids. I know that if I have a, uh, someone who is very knowledgeable about college admissions and college counseling, like, I would love to learn more about this. And so that's why I'm sharing this to you through this platform. And so I'm very excited to announce that I will be having a new business, and that is called Avila College Consulting. And right now what I am doing is just a beta program for anyone who has a rising junior or a rising senior. So that means that coming this 2026-2027 school year, if you have a junior or a senior, I would love to work with you, especially in this beta group. Because I am offering super discounted options, so that way you can kinda be a part of this inaugural class, to help me and support me in my professional development as well. And so if you have a rising senior or junior at home, or anyone that you know within your familia, or friend group, or whatever it is, and you want to be a part of this beta group, please feel free to reach out to me at podcast@vivalamami.com, or you can send me a DM on Instagram, which is vivalamami. And I can share with you the link to schedule a free 20-minute consultation, with you and your student, and that way we can figure out what is best for you, But also to see if I would be a good fit, and likewise, right? I want this to be a mutual agreement, a mutual connection that I have with your student. But I am just very excited to have this We're living in Mexico right now. I'm trying to figure out ways on how to build a business. And in fact, I'm also in the process of, expanding, a beta group here in Mexico to help them with international college admissions. There's a lot of people here in León and in the Bajillo area that are interested to have their university studies in the United States, and even Canada. And I'm pretty knowledgeable in that. I reviewed international college applications. And so I really want to help students to, to get to college, especially for those of us that are first-generation parents that perhaps have the means to afford a college consultant. And this can really revolutionize the way that colleges review applications, where they're just not generalizing on people, right? Where they're just not, like, you know, believing that the student didn't try as hard. But even as first-gen parents, we probably need that additional support to help our student and be the most competitive applicant there is in that specific applicant pool. So if you have any questions, feel free to reach out, like I said, but if you are really, really interested in this beta group, I will be adding the link for you to schedule your free 20-minute consultation with me, and that way I can share with you what is next in line with Avila College Consulting. All right, amiga, I know that this was a lot, and I know that it's not really similar to Viva La Mami and things like that, but I did want to announce this through my podcast, and that way you are familiar with who I am and who I was, like, way back then before I became a mom, but also on how I can support either your sibling or your child or your niece, nephew, whoever it is. But I'm here to, help first-gen parents to help their second-generation college student get into college because, let me tell y'all, it's very competitive. So for the next three episodes, I'm going to be sharing a little bit more about this sort of topic about college admissions because it's going to be summer and I want to prepare you of all things related to college admissions and college access, so that way you can be a little bit more equipped about what's to come in the following year, especially for your rising junior or senior. All right, amiga, enough of this. I know I took long, but I want to thank you for listening if you stood until the very end, y nos vemos in the next episode.